


the angel i saw that day

by orphan_account



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, M/M, Pain, Suicide, requitedlove
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-09
Updated: 2020-09-09
Packaged: 2021-03-06 15:40:39
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,289
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26371336
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: “I'll wait.” Tobio whispered to himself. He reluctantly pushed his weight off the railing and stepped back on to the hard floor with his bare feet sending shivers up his legs from the cold solid floor. Shoes laid next to the curve of the slabs of cement used to hold down the old worn out railing.
Relationships: Hinata Shouyou/Kageyama Tobio
Kudos: 36





	the angel i saw that day

Kageyama stood there looking over the school. Leaning his weight against the rough oxidized railing that rubbed against his rough fingertips. It could break at any moment but he seemed to like that risk. Falling off the roof wasn't a major concern since that was necessarily the whole point but feeling the cool breeze push his raven hair back made him feel at ease for a sliver of a second. He watched as the light pink flower petals began falling off the branches from the gentle push of the wind, descending in swaying motions and abruptly landing on the entrance of the school.

He started leaning over a bit to look at the students leaving school. Some were laughing with big groups of people and some were walking by themselves. They all looked so small from the four stories he was up on. He missed the happiness they had on their face. He wanted to feel like that reminisce in happy memories with all his friends. But all he could do is push people away. Hating that they had such happy looks on their faces. No matter how much Kageyama swore he didn't care about others, he at least wanted to protect them from seeing the traumatic event that would occur soon.

“I'll wait.” Tobio whispered to himself. He reluctantly pushed his weight off the railing and stepped back on to the hard floor with his bare feet sending shivers up his legs from the cold solid floor. Shoes laid next to the curve of the slabs of cement used to hold down the old worn out railing.

He proceeded to lay his back on the cold slabs of concrete that were slightly still damp from Tuesday's rain. While looking up at the clear sky. It was spring and it felt fresh and new. The wind quietly rustled in the trees from the soft wind and the cherry blossoms were covering Miyagi Prefecture. The air was pink, dewey and smooth brushing against his skin. It felt warm and was comforting. Tobio laid there looking up at the sky wondering when everyone would finish leaving it was starting to get late he only heard a few voices but none familiar. Reassuring him all his teammates left, soon it would be just him, the school and his inevitable death.

Kageyama felt his pocket vibrate twice but he didn’t want to open it. Partly because he wanted to stay in that position he was in for longer but also because he was scared it would be the one he wanted to see the least. The one that could convince him to stop. The one that could convince him he could live another day. His brain was just full of that one special boy mind fogged of what would happen sooner or later. All he thought of was about that roughed up middle blocker that his life relied on.

_So he ignored it. ___

__Kageyama looked over at his calloused hand staring at all the wrinkles and creases that folded into his hand when he formed a weak sloppy fist that would barely be able to make Shoyo let out a grunt or yelp. He wanted to stop thinking about him, he wanted to stop hurting everytime his messy hair resurfaced in his mind. All he felt was a stab in the heart every time the playful and childish like smile crossed his brain. He didn't want to think about it._ _

__Turning to his side to keep his mind off the orange haired boy he looked at the volleyball Hinata had gifted him for his birthday. Now his mind was riddled with thoughts about him. The ball was nothing special, just a standard volleyball but it always reminded him of Hinata. He gifted it to him when Kageyama had his volleyball stolen by some misfit kids in the neighborhood. It didn't really matter to him knowing he could just get a new one, and the one those kids ‘stole’ was pretty old and torn up. Only to find out he didn't have any spare change to buy a new one which bummed him out. In the end Shoyo bought one for him as a gift, and now it stuck to Kageyama wherever he went. The thought of that ball alone agonized him, filling him up with so many memories that tormented him._ _

__Pushing his body up he looked at his school bag and there it layed wide open papers laying on the floor and clasp broken from being thrown down. A mechanical pencil Hinata had let him borrow was on the floor. It was old and used but anything Hinata gave or bought for him was precious to him. Just glancing at the worn out pencil caused him crippling affliction, a pain uncanny to the rest. He didn’t want Hinata to have nothing to remember him by, he wanted to live but he couldn't. The pain has no source other than the vast abyss it comes from. To be completely honest all his happiness was rooted from that energetic ball of sunshine named Shoyo Hinata. It was always him that put a smile on his face, it was always him that got him out of bed and it was always him that gave him the constant excuse of having another day to live._ _

___To put it simply Shoyo Hinata was the love of his life. ____ _

____ _ _

____‘Why hasn’t he answered me back yet school ended a while ago..?’ Hinata thought to himself, he started to wonder if he just left earlier than him. But Kageyama never skipped practice. This wasn't like him at all. Hinata kept pondering over the situation walking back and forth in the changing room waiting for Tobio to respond to his text wondering what he could be doing. Hinata started growing more and more impatient looking at his phone every two minutes._ _ _ _

____“30 minutes and no response..” Usually Kageyama would only take 5 minutes to respond to Shoyo’s texts and would always text him goodnight. The redhead was acting like a child who was being ignored, he wasn’t used to being ghosted by his best friend like that. He picked up his phone again though this time not to check on the text but to call him. Though his raven haired friend was bad with calls he wanted to practice with him even if it meant getting home late he just wanted to spend time with him._ _ _ _

_____He just missed him a lot. ____ _ _ _

______Shoyo pressed the call button letting it ring, but the short boy felt as if something was wrong. It felt gut wrenching like calling was a bad idea; like there was something extremely bad that was going to happen sooner or later. This put a panic in him, he was now bouncing his knee up and down from anxiety biting his nail waiting for his teammate to answer the call but to no avail he didn't answer. Hinata started to get really worried calling again and letting it ring over and over again, but no answer. He pressed one last time hoping he would answer._ _ _ _ _ _

______‘ring’_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Hello..?” Kageyama answered. Hinata let out a small smile while his worries started to disappear and he got his reassuring answer. The raven haired boy was ok, he was safe but he wasn't speaking. It sounded windy, air pushing into the mic of the phone was he really safe?_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Kageyama where are you?” Hinata shouted._ _ _ _ _ _

______“The roof.” And he hung up. Just like that the call ended Shoyo was left dumb founded sitting there when he got that bad feeling again but this time it was worse, this pain was immeasurable it wasnt physically agonizing but in his heart it hurt, like he was being called towards someone. His heart was telling him to see someone; someone he loved. He was in a panic breath hitching, squeezing his shirt with all his strength, legs shaking and his heart hurt . He felt the need to be held by the tall boy's arms he wanted to be in his embrace. He missed him, he wanted him, he wanted to have him say it's alright and that everything will be fine._ _ _ _ _ _

______He got up quickly; not thinking about anything, only on Kageyama he rushed out the door not wasting any time to turn off the light or close the door hastily. He wanted to see him so bad. He wanted him to stop the pain he was feeling the agony he was being put through he knew what the raven haired boy was doing and he refused to believe it he didn't want to. The denial he felt was coursing through his body he had to make sure Kageyama was fine. He was okay._ _ _ _ _ _

______Hinata could no longer see it was all blurry and hot. Tears filled his face he didn't know what he was looking at or why he was crying he just needed himself to find Tobio. The direction he was going in guided itself running up a course of stairs, tripping over and over but getting right back up. Adrenaline was coursing through his veins he couldn’t feel he couldn’t think properly all he thought about was Tobio Kageyama nothing else. His brain is only filled with memories about him, nothing else only his blue eyes, flat hair and athletic build. And then he finally saw the door to the rooftop._ _ _ _ _ _

______There was a volleyball and mechanical pencil on the floor and a piece of paper. It was dark. He couldn't see it, his eyes were adjusting to the darkness before he could actually see what was written before him. His eyes widened with tears; letting out before he even knew they were coming out he looked out the window and saw Kageyama standing behind the railing. It was true. He was going to die right before his eyes._ _ _ _ _ _

______Before he knew it Shoyo punched the glass as hard as he could trying to smash it open with his bare fist repeatedly acting animalistically. The redhead just didn't care; he just needed Kageyama. He had to be with him at least until the very end. He started shaking the door handle hurriedly close to breaking it with his violent shakes. The boy that was a couple feet away from him was ignoring him. This is what true pain felt like. Hinata couldn’t let out a word his sobs choked any indication of speech. He was only focused on what was in front of him, but Kageyama wouldn't listen; he intentionally ignored him knowing if he turned back he would open the door. But the pain and numbness would leave soon, the dark void that kept him drowning wouldn't exist soon._ _ _ _ _ _

______Hinata's hand was going numb, the glass was only filled with small fractures and the smearing of blood. His hand went fully numb only relying on the shorter boys emotions to keep punching the glass. But emotions weren’t enough, the numbness started to subside and he could start to feel that glass stuck in his hand that was covered in blood. As the pain started to set in he had to stop punching it becoming physically unbearable for him. He stared as Kageyama looked down, leaning his weight more off the railing and into the cold empty air. Shoyo couldn’t bear to watch this; and accidentally letting out a long sob sounding like a baby who hasn't been fed causing Kageyama to pull back his weight a little._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Please just get off of there!” The redhead cried out feeling the sharp pain in his heart getting worse and worse per word._ _ _ _ _ _

______“No.” Kageyama responded to him in a cold blooded manner almost like he didn't even know him._ _ _ _ _ _

______It didn't matter if he said no the tears streaming down his face burned and the hand used to punch the window was useless. Hinata's other hand just layed on the door handle, his puffy eyes stared at Kageyama; his heart hurt an unbearable amount he wanted him to stop. He wanted him to look at him at least one more time, he wanted to smile at him like when he perfectly spikes his set, he just wanted to see Kageyama why couldn't he turn around and unlock the door why couldn't give him a hug, a smile, a kiss, an anything to reassure Shoyo that it would be ok._ _ _ _ _ _

______Kageyama started to turn over at Hinata slowly looking over at his teammate, his best friend, the love of his life; tears ran down his face looking at the blood covered window that the frail boy attempted to break down. Hinata stared at him, tears filling his eyes again. His eyes widened when he looked at Hinata his arm was covered in blood and glass shards and Hinata's eyes letting out endless streaming tears and his face disheveled legs shaking an immediate wave of guilt flew over Kageyama looking at his friend in such a sorry state. It was his fault. He hurt the most precious thing that he had in his life. Because Kageyama was selfish. He was selfish. Selfishness._ _ _ _ _ _

______His grip loosened on the railing finally letting go of his tight hold. But Hinata wasn't in the window; the window was shattered. Everything was going in slow motion. He wasn't scared life wasn't flashing before eyes, everything was just going slower and slower seeing everything in a clear view. Until he saw an angel appear before him the angel had no wings but it reached his arms out to Tobio Kageyama the angel's name was Shoyo Hinata with a reassuring smile that would make anyone melt and before his eyes he saw the angel say something._ _ _ _ _ _

______“You’re the love of my life”_ _ _ _ _ _


End file.
